The Return, Part 1

“How hard could it be?” As the saying goes, famous last words.

Carter here. Yes, I am finally back. For reasons that are far too difficult to explain succinctly but will hopefully become clear later, I had to go “off the grid” for a while. Of course, when I say “I had to” I mean I was forced. I must apologize to my dear sister of course and to April, who must have gone through as much emotional turmoil during my absence, which was unfortunately against my free will.

I will attempt to best explain what happened to me, which is quite a tale, so I will publish the posts over the next three days. In order to understand everything that has happened over the past two months, it is best to explain it in reverse, starting the reacquisition of this blog.

It may not seem like much, but I have been reestablished by orders from ranking government officials. I have now been commissioned a kind of ambassadorship of my people here on earth. While the government has been monitoring my actions including this blog from the beginning, they have only recently come to see the value in having an advanced alien intelligence as an ally. Of course, my sister is laughing at me right now as I refer to myself as said intelligence, but what do earth governments know. (I am also sure any government agents out there monitoring this blog have a sense of humor, which I am attempting to develop. Ha.)

So, once the government saw the usefulness of a direct, friendly forum with aliens (yes, I did say aliens with an emphasis on the plural, but more on that later), they needed a plan to get control of it. Unfortunately for them, I was detained. Thank goodness, my sister came through.

As I will explain further in Part 2, the reason for my disappearance was because I had been kidnapped by others of my own kind. Having already established that our Prince was living among humans for some time, I was prepared for this encounter, which is why I had set up my emergency protocols in a way only my sister could access them.

Back when Madison convinced me to write this blog about my life on Earth, I knew there would be more than a little risk. Yes, the government knew exactly where I was, so that was hardly a mystery, and I had established that humans will pretty much except and dismiss everything without a thought, so most would think my internet ramblings were pure entertainment. Most of the rest would be relatively benign, and any small danger from humans, I thought I had accounted for. No, it was my own alien race that I worried about reading this blog. If they were to discover it, not knowing I was alive and trying to contact them, in the wrong eyes, I would be seen as a threat exposing our ways and plans to out intended targets. (Again, more on that later.)

So, when I was "kidnapped" as you humans say, I had already set up my simple internet blog with more than the simple user password, so it shut down. It was an automated time lock that would track my whereabouts. So, I knew that when my sister, who was the only one possibly able to get into my computer, finally established contact, it would lead her right to me. Fortunately, I had also counted on the government discovering this blog was a trans-galactic communications device, so they would have an interest in helping my sister get it all back.

From what Madison tells me, the government, your government then came up with a foolproof plan to hack into my own system, shut down a major communications and shipping lane, infiltrate the alien team that had kidnapped me, and somehow in the end come out with no human casualties and getting me out alive.

It was a success, I must admit. I am here after all. I am not sure how much stealth was actually involved compared to the gullibility of the residents of Southern California. You may have heard of the cover story they used for the chaos that was my prison break.

They called it CARMAGEDDON.

A rather pedestrian code-name if you ask me, but then American English is not my first language. But “How could it go wrong?” they said. Well, I will explain exactly how in the next part...